The Lie About Time -why it is killing us + what feminine wisdom says to do instead
I have never met a woman who does not desire more space in her life – for herself, for spending time with those she loves, for doing the things she loves…
Yet when it comes down to making choices to ‘spend time’ on herself, we feel guilty, like we should be spending our time and money on others or “more responsible” things. And no matter how much we may need or want the space, we convince ourselves it’s impossible to ‘make the time.’
So like women have done for too many centuries to count, we suck it up, push ahead and sacrifice ourselves in the name of what we love, who we love and what we feel must be done.
We have accepted a reality where it’s normal and acceptable (and maybe even valiant) for a women to sacrifice herself for her family, her work and her responsibilities.
We have become martyrs to time. And indentured servants to our lives.
And in many ways, this is not our fault. We are trapped in systems – belief, working, familial, educational, health – that can make it seem impossible to make any other choice but to sacrifice ourselves or settle for the moments of ‘self care’ that we are told should be enough. Self care has become a buzz word that brings up images of pampering and privilege but what I am talking about is so much deeper that this.
And I believe that if we truly desire to change this world into one that values women, supports the family, sustains life then we have to bust through to an honest conversation about what is happening to women all over this world –
Physically – we are getting sick and dying. 1 in 3 women will die of heart disease, that used to be 1 in 4 (that is the wrong direction and it’s not because of eating too many french fries) The tremendous amount of pressure we are under has stretched us so thin and has us moving so fast that our hearts are like workhorses we drive til we drop. Even the most strong amazing women are running on fumes. Yet they feel like they can’t find the time to replenish until their physical body revolts (note: the physical body is the last place disease shows up.)
Emotionally - we feel isolated, alone, defeated and sometimes even in despair. I can’t tell you the number of women I sit with in circle and mentor privately that admit they have found themselves in tears because of the sheer pressure. Yet the don’t know how or see how they can make their life any different. And instead of the first instinct being to reach out, connect and get support, they tell themselves they should be able to ‘figure this out’ on their own.
Spiritually – we are plugged into conventional wisdom instead of Divine Wisdom which in this current world climate is like choosing to eat “Fear Flakes” for breakfast instead of Wisdom Wheaties! In any given retreat or circle I will ask how many women have a consistent daily morning practice where they are connecting to themselves, their body and their Divine downline and Inner wisdom. 20% at best will raise their hand. When I ask why, it’s always about not having the “time.”
Mentally – cloudy, foggy, feelings of anxiety, fear, frustration, can’t fall asleep because there is so much too do and not enough time to do it in – our minds are burned out and overwhelmed. Our minds are working overtime and we don’t feel like “we have the time” to do what our minds need to be healthy – like slowing down, walking in nature, being off digital devices for extended periods, cleaning our metal bodies just like we take a shower to clean our physical bodies.
Breaking out of this paradigm of never having enough time isn’t easy – we are all like fish in a contaminated fishbowl who don’t know we are swimming in water that’s poisioning us. It’s all we have ever known so we don’t question it.
Breaking out to this lack of time paradigm is not just some nice luxury of pampering…it’s not some 7 steps to self care…
Our very health and lives depend on changing our relationship to time so we can create the space we need physically, emotionally, mentally and spiritually.
A few wisdom bytes about time:
- You can’t find time - it’s not lost.
- You can’t make time – there is no time kitchen.
- Time is finite – there is only 24 hours / 7 days a week / 365 days a year based on how man created linear time – which is why it inherently creates stress, it is limited.
- When you live within the constraints of linear time you will always feel like you don’t have enough. You will be “time poor” and so of course you won’t feel like you can take that week or weekend retreat … take a day or afternoon every month to do what you love… do a daily practice every morning to set yourself up strong for the day… retreat even from home every few months without kids, family and partner to just tune into yourself.
- You can choose to change your operating systems from “finding time” to “creating space” - Spiritual teachers and mystics AND scientests know that there is a more natural and powerful construct that orders the universe into harmony and can therefore can order your life into harmony – I call it the Feminine Super Power of Creating Space.
So much to share and study and expand your understanding of to get you off the time sucking matrix and onto the space freeing web of wisdom where YOU get what you need. No one is coming to change the systems to be programmed to support vs sacrifice. We are the ones. And together we can make this change.
In this Feminine Power Time, I Christine Arylo invites you to:
- See how we are screwing ourselves out of what we need because we’ve bought into and are living on a ‘linear time based’ system that by nature makes us feel like we are behind and don’t enough time.
- Invoke and learn to use and trust the Feminine Power of Creating Space - scientifically proven and spiritually practiced for thousands of year – with simple practices that elevate your consciousness about how time and space really work.
- Change our Time Talk - get wise about how you talk about time is causing you to feel stressed about time.
- Take a stand in sisterhood for ourselves and all women that taking space for ourselves away from our family, work and other responsibilities is not selfish or impossible – it’s life critical. And a normal, natural way to live.
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To learn the ancient wisdom practices for cultivating vitality, releasing stress AND reprogramming yourself on the inside to release the old programming that keeps you sacrificing yourself instead of supporting yourself join us for the Burnout to Balance practice.