The Permission & How-To Love Yourself, For real and for keeps

Choose & Love Yourself First In All Romantic Relationships

What if you could flip a switch and stop the critical voice in your head?

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Martha Beck“Use this book as a coach, a comforter, a BFF, and a path to a more joyful life.”

Martha Beck, New York Times bestselling author and columnist for O, The Oprah Magazine

Lissa Rankin, MD“This book will not only help you feel happier when you learn to combat your inner demons and breathe life into your inner wisdom; it’s also literally medicine for the body, mind, and soul.”

Lissa Rankin, MD, New York Times bestselling author of Mind Over Medicine

SARK“Ahlers and Arylo have created a significant paradigm shift. They are changing the way women relate to their inner critics, and women are thinking and acting more powerfully as a result.”
SARK (Susan Ariel Rainbow Kennedy), bestselling author and artist

Give Yourself Permission to make the loving choices for yourself – everyday.

Dare to take a stand for the most important relationship you will ever have — the one with yourself

Most of us know that loving ourselves would be a good idea, but we have no clue what that really means. Self-love feels too vast, too esoteric, and frankly like something you should keep under wraps. After 10 years of trying to answer the questions, “How do I actually love myself?” and “Why is it so hard?”, I finally found not just the answers but I the how-to! This book is the how to go beyond the idea of loving, valuing, and caring for yourself to daring actions and adventures that will help you experience it.

I wrote this go-to guidebook on self-love, to provide practical, creative, fun ways to explore and embody the 10 branches of self-love – Self-Esteem, Self-Acceptance, Self-Empowerment, Self-Care, Self-Respect, Self Compassion, Self-Pleasure + more…

tree1You’ll take a series of SELF LOVE PULSE CHECKs for each of the branches – to see where you are already rocking out your relationship with yourself, and where you need to stop and apply some love, and amp up your best friend behavior.

Now I warn you that this book isn’t some theoretical book on self-love…. it’s full of :

  • DARING ADVENTURES TO TAKE (daring acts of love, that are also super fun)
  • DEEP QUESTIONS TO ASK YOURSELF (heart-to-heart ME moments)
  • LOVE MANTRAS (to get more love flowing you’ll be love talking to yourself)
  • ME-ART (your inner 5-year old is gonna love these creative expressions of your heart!)

Take the adventures, look inside for answers, and liberate yourself into love.

START EXPERIENCING LOVE FOR YOURSELF BIG TIME! You give love to so many other people, why not to yourself?

Imagine being able to…

  • Give to yourself first, without guilt
  • Shower yourself with loving words, instead of criticism and comparison
  • Go for your dreams with conviction and courage, without holding back
  • Choose only situations and relationships that make you happiest
  • Give yourself permission to take a break – even when you’ve got a gazillion things to do

Okay, enough talking… let’s get this adventure going!


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Don’t just take my word, other peeps love the book too!

SARKMuch more than a self-help book, Madly in Love with ME is an illuminated self-love guidebook that shows you exactly how to love yourself well and live your happiest life- no matter what.

SARK |Artist, Glad No Matter What

FORDMADLY IN LOVE WITH ME is a passionate call for each of us to make peace with who we are and love ourselves unconditionally.”

Arielle Ford | Wabi Sabi Love

Rhonda BrittenChristine Arylo takes the illusive task of learning to love yourself and turns it into a concrete, how-to, doable path that anyone can master. This is by far one of my all time favorite books.

Rhonda Britten | Emmy-Award winner, Fearless Living

Madly in Love with Me bookThere is nothing more powerful, beautiful or free than a person who chooses to love… especially themselves. To see the impact this book has had on others, read the reviews by other readers.

CLICK HERE to read reviews by other readers


Choosing Me before We bookORDER NOW
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If you want to take a stand for only having loving, respectful relationships that rock your soul, fill your heart with love, and support your dreams, then this book was written for you.

Warning: Prepare to be challenged… prepare to get honest with yourself… and prepare to choose love for yourself for good, no matter who you are or aren’t sleeping next too.

This book is the go-to book on self-respect, self-honor and self-empowerment when it comes to romantic relationships that we all needed, but few of us got.

I wrote this book, as a woman who almost married the wrong guy for all the wrong reasons. Smart, full of self-esteem, but low on self-love, I had made receiving love from him more important than me living the life my heart and soul desired. Until I woke up and took 5 very important promises with myself (they are all in the book) and got honest about what I was doing to keep away the love and partnership I wanted.

After watching my smart and talented girlfriends, making the same mistakes and wasting so much time and energy on the state of their romantic lives or in dealing with their dramatic relationships – I just had to share what I learned, that led me to not only loving myself, but finding and keeping a really great partner.

I wrote this book for women of all ages, relationship stages and romantic orientation (men tell me they love it too!) Whether you’re seeking a relationship, evaluating a less than fulfilling one, rebounding from a bad breakup, or working through issues with a partner, Choosing ME before WE can show you how to:

  • Take a stand for only having loving, respectful relationships
  • Stop settling and start choosing partnership that support your best life
  • Get real about the kind of relationship – and LIFE! — you are looking for
  • Stop making the same mistakes, and dating the same jackasses
  • Stop making your choices from a place of lack, loneliness or fear and start making them from a place of wholeness, self-empowerment and self-honor.

This is not just me, Christine Arylo, talking at you as some expert … this is me sharing

  • My biggest SPIRITUAL AND SELF-LOVE AHA’s (seriously why do we not get a memo at birth about these things!)
  • SUPER POWERED QUESTIONS that will lead you to your own answers (having the right question can shift everything)
  • HOW TO GET PAST THE PAST so you can get on to the LOVE you want (we’ve all made mistakes, and hearing other people’s stories makes it easier to let go and move forward)
  • THE 5 VOWS you must take and keep with yourself before you can have a great relationship with anyone else
  • THE CORE FOUR, my secret tool for getting really clear on the person you really want to be with, not in your mind or ego, but in your heart and soul.
  • THE TRUTH ABOUT INTIMACY & CONNECTION and how we push away the good love we want most (so you can make sure you don’t dump good potential mates!)



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Readers Say:

If I had the extra money, I would buy a copy of this book and gift it to every woman I know. Truly a life-changing book, and those are words I don’t take lightly. Wow! – Kaki
I went through the book with highlighter, tabs and journal in hand. I seriously collected more real, useful tidbits from this book than I think I’ve ever gotten from therapy. This is not fluff or filler, but real substance mixed with Christine’s personal experiences and antic dotes. Since reading the book I’ve bought several additional copies to keep on hand for friends who are going through relationship or self-esteem challenges. It’s a gem! – Katherine
It felt like I was talking to my girlfriend or with someone whose opinion I could really trust. – Shabnam

Publisher’s Weekly Says:

Author and life coach Arylo’s own life story informs every page of this insightful book. After a 15-year relationship, her fiancé called it quits two hours before the engagement party, causing Arylo, a successful marketing executive, months of devastation and self-doubt.
This three-part guide about co-dependent relationships, settling for the wrong man and not knowing what you want begins with “Me,” showing how crucial it is to get to know yourself first because “our relationships are mirrors of ourselves.” Arylo delves a little deeper than most by being honest about how many women are in denial about relationships being fueled by the fear of being alone and feeling incomplete. In part two (“He”), the author guides the reader through a series of visualizations to identify four core qualities the reader wants in her future mate, and part three (“We”) advises on maintaining authenticity and intimacy in a relationship.
This exercise in intention-setting and manifestation will help any woman who wants a lasting partnership that reflects her own true self.”


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