REFORM YOUR INNER MEAN GIRL
Best-Selling Book:
Best-Selling Book:
A Proven Creative Process that Guides You Through
Transforming Your Inner Critic & Empowering Your Inner Wisdom,
So You Can Be a More Centered & Clear Presence and
Make Wise Choices in All Areas of Your Life
Transforming Your Inner Critic & Empowering Your Inner Wisdom,
So You Can Be a More Centered & Clear Presence and
Make Wise Choices in All Areas of Your Life
REFORM YOUR INNER MEAN GIRL
Best-Selling Book:
Best-Selling Book:
A Proven Creative Process that Guides You Through
Transforming Your Inner Critic & Empowering Your Inner Wisdom,
So You Can Be a More Centered & Clear Presence and
Make Wise Choices in All Areas of Your Life
Transforming Your Inner Critic & Empowering Your Inner Wisdom,
So You Can Be a More Centered & Clear Presence and
Make Wise Choices in All Areas of Your Life
REFORM YOUR INNER MEAN GIRL
Best-Selling Book:
Best-Selling Book:
A Proven Creative Process that Guides You Through
Transforming Your Inner Critic & Empowering Your Inner Wisdom,
So You Can Be a More Centered & Clear Presence and
Make Wise Choices in All Areas of Your Life
Transforming Your Inner Critic & Empowering Your Inner Wisdom,
So You Can Be a More Centered & Clear Presence and
Make Wise Choices in All Areas of Your Life
While the idea of the inner critic isn’t new,
how it works within women and girls is specific.
We need a different approach that supports our wellbeing & realities vs. strengthens our self-doubt & stress.
how it works within women and girls is specific.
We need a different approach that supports our wellbeing & realities vs. strengthens our self-doubt & stress.
This is the inner critic book written for and by women.
What if instead of trying to silence, tame or ignore this part of ourselves, we started listening to what she is trying to tell us? Learned to turn the internal pressure + negative thinking – which we call “self-bullying” – into self-empowered, compassionate action?
What is this internal force often called the inner critic trying to reveal to us? What’s her motivation?
How do we turn down the volume of the negative-self talk and turn up the volume of our internal wisdom when you get triggered?
How can we strengthen our connection to our inner wisdom to make better choices for our careers, relationships, and well-being?
Truth? We are quicker to recognize when others bully or disrespect us, but it’s harder to discern when we do it to ourselves. There is a voice within each of us that whispers that we are not good enough, smart enough, beautiful enough, or deserving of the life, relationships, or careers we desire. And even when we do hit the mark, the voice raises the bar or points out someone who’s done it “better.”
That voice has a name—meet the Inner Mean Girl.
Consider This: Strangely, our Inner Mean Girl is trying to protect us, which is why we don’t want to just shut her down or kill her off. But while her tactics for keeping us safe might have worked for a time, we get to a point in our lives, where they are keeping us stuck.
Which is why at the same time we are getting to understand and calm (not tame!) our Inner Mean Girl, we need to also strengthen the other, wiser, force within us: our Inner Wisdom. She is compassionate, creative, and she knows how to navigate change and uncertainty and make choices that support our well-being and goals.
The question is: How do we turn down the volume (and triggers) of our inner critics, so that we can listen to our inner wisdom?
Abounding in humor, creativity, and self-inquiry, Reform Your Inner Mean Girl guides us through a transformative seven-step process—designed by women, for women—to repurpose our self-sabotaging mindsets & patterns into ones that are driven by self-awareness, self-compassion, and self-confidence.
By showing us how to connect with and trust our inner wisdom, this guidebook empowers us to make wiser choices for lasting well-being and harmony in our lives, relationships, and careers.
In this guidebook, Christine Arylo and Amy Ahlers teach how to:
- Identify the 13 kinds of Inner Mean Girl archetypes that are most prominent within you
- Transform toxic habits like: Comparison, Perfectionism, Over-Promising, Isolation & Self-Doubt
- Reveal what motivates, triggers, and soothes your unique inner critic – and what she is trying to protect you from
- Understand what you need to support your emotional & mental well-being during an inner critic flare up, including how to calm the anxiety, anger, fear and pressure when it arises.
- Listen to + trust our inner wisdom – so you can make wiser choices for your life, relationships, and career, especially when it stretches you or guides you to do things differently than others.
- Use creative, playful practices that lead to lasting transformation – taking us beyond an intellectual understanding of the inner critic to integrate body/mind/heart/spirit which empowers us to access deeper transformation
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When we understand the motivation behind our negative self-talk and the pressure we place on ourselves, we can unlock the ability to transform the self-sabotaging pressure of our inner critics into the supportive, wise guidance of our inner wisdom.
By practicing working consciously with these two internal forces in our own lives, we then gain the embodied wisdom to share and model these skills with those we influence, love, and guide.
BREAKING IT DOWN
Christine Arylo and Amy Ahlers refined this internationally recognized seven-step process over a five-year period, testing their methodology in six countries with over 30,000 women of diverse backgrounds, socioeconomic statuses, professions, and life stages.
The Reform Your Inner Mean Girl program has been taught to and practiced by women and girls from eight to eighty-eight years old in professional training, personal development courses & retreats, therapy sessions, grade schools & high schools, and within women’s prison systems.
- Step 1: Reveal Your Type of Inner Mean Girl from 13 Different Archetypes
- Step 2: Explore Your Inner Mean Girl’s Tricks and Triggers
- Step 3: Discover What Motivates Your Inner Mean Girl and Truly Drives You
- Step 4: Turn Up the Volume on Your Inner Wisdom
- Step 5: Make Your Inner Wisdom Your Most Trusted Ally
- Step 6: Give Up Self-Bullying for Good
- Step 7: Assign Your Inner Mean Girl Her New Job
What we found over the many years and many kinds of people we’ve worked with is this: the power is in the mix of playfulness + self-inquiry + practical application in our day to day lives. It’s the use of creativity + curiousity + somatic processes and approaches that get into the heart + body, backed up with the wisdom from realms such as brain science and human consciousness development that create insights and breakthroughs that last.
TAKE THE INNER MEAN GIRL QUIZ
What Kind of Inner Mean Girl Do You Have?
What Practices Can Switch the Channel in Your Head?
What Practices Can Switch the Channel in Your Head?
There are 13 Common Archetypes of Inner Mean Girls in Women… including the Perfectionist * Doing Addict * Good Girl * Achievement Junkie * Worrywart *
and more…
and more…
Check out a few of the Inner Mean Girl Expose’s and Images created by women & girls we’ve worked with:
Take the Inner Critic Quiz
We Created for Women & Young Adults
(also included in Chapter 1 of the book)
We Created for Women & Young Adults
(also included in Chapter 1 of the book)
- Discover what kind of Inner Critic you have based on the 13 Inner Mean Girl Archetypes
- Uncover the first step to reforming your Inner Mean Girl so you can start empowering your Inner Wisdom
- Receive a full Inner Mean Girl Archetype Report with Deactivator Tools – ranks all 13 archetypes plus gives you simple tools to make shift happen in the moment
WHAT READERS SAY
Reform You Inner Mean Girl showed me how I was bullying myself.
Before, I didn’t see the external realities I was struggling with where rooted in my internal negative self-talk about how I was not good enough, how I was a failure, how I didn’t deserve what other people deserve to have.
The process gave me permission to put my desires above all else – even when that means disappointing another person. I learned where my fears were actually coming from, and how to respond to the mean voices in my head.
Now I take time each day to check in with my inner wisdom about what she has to say. I am developing such a rich and rewarding relationship with her.
— Katie Leathers, Women’s Empowerment Educator & Coach
Read Katie’s full transformation tale here
Revealing + Transforming My Inner Mean Girl Changed My Life
The Inner Mean Girl transformational processes changed my life forever. It was the catalyst for me going from an overworked perfectionist, with no time for romance, and a job that was killing me, to a woman who takes care of herself, faces her fears, loves her body in the shape it is and is creating a life aligned with who I really am, including quitting my job, taking a sabbatical and redefining who I am and how I want to serve through my work.
My Inner Mean Girl still occasionally rears her ugly head, but I know how to transform her negative talk into what it is I really need.
— Mary M., former government director, now thriving entrepreneur and consultant traveling the world
Read Mary Stellas full transformation tale here
I have become much more aware of my internal triggers, and I now more deeply understand the reasons behind my toxic habits.
In all areas of my life, professional and personal, I am now consciously shifting my toxic habits with the tools and it’s working!
As a coach who works with high-achieving professional women and MBA students, I am so much stronger at guiding them to work with their two inner forces.
It’s an ongoing process to continue cultivating my self-trust and now I have access to a system that works.
— Jen Yang, Taiwan, MBA
I now have a structure, language and self-understanding that supports me to go after and live my highest calling and dreams, even when I am scared or uncertain!
At last I finally KNOW WHEN the B.S. of my Inner Mean Girl thoughts are coming up and I now have the tools to change in the moment and get back to my Inner Wisdom.
— Gayle M., corporate executive, certified coach, mother
WHAT OTHER WOMEN LEADERS & TRANSFORMATIONAL TEACHERS SAY
“A significant paradigm shift! This work is changing the way people relate to their Inner Critics, and people think and act more powerfully as a result…I can heartily recommend their work and have witnessed the resulting transformations firsthand.”
— SARK, Susan Ariel Rainbow Kennedy, bestselling author and artist
“Many books have been written about how to navigate the inner dialogue of women, so why are we still so hard on ourselves?” This book holds the key to unlock the mystery. The Inner Mean Girl work is essential to the development of the feminine psyche. I’ve witnessed thousands of women’s lives transformed as a result.
— Shiloh Sophia McCloud, founder of Musea, International School for Intentional Creativity
“This book is literally medicine for the body, mind, heart and soul.”
— Dr. Lissa Rankin, MD, NYT Best-Selling author of Mind Over Medicine
BOOK RESOURCES
MEET THE AUTHORS
CHRISTINE ARYLO
Transformational Leadership Advisor, MBA, Wisdom Teacher, Social Innovator & four-time author
For over 20 years, Arylo has been devoted to working with emerging and established women leaders across generations & geography to break through the invisible systemic and self-created interference that has kept women stuck in realities, relationships, careers and cycles that diminish our true power, wisdom and presence.
Her unique approach and super power for creating new models, practices, and processes that lead people to new insights, deeper wisdom, a path to do things differently have made her a sought-out thought leader, advisor, coach, teacher and facilitator for individuals, teams, organizations ready for lasting transformation & elevation.
AMY AHLERS
Master Coach and Speaker
Amy Ahlers is a master coach, keynote speaker, and the bestselling author on a mission to STOP women from self-bullying and being so darn hard on themselves so they can make their brightest contribution.
With over two decades of coaching experience, Amy also leads a high level women’s leadership accelerator to help women confidently rise into the income, impact, and contribution they desire and deserve. She wholeheartedly believes it’s time for women to claim their seat at the leadership table and use their voice Amy resides in the San Francisco Bay Area with her family and rescue mutt, Auggie.