4 Steps to Transform Self Sabotage & Self Sacrifice into Self Love
Why can it be so hard to make the self supportive, self empowering, self loving choice in our relationships, work, health and happiness? Why do we default to self-sabotage and self-sacrifice? There are real reasons why, and real paths to re-programming your ‘default’ setting to choose self love.
I made you the video above to share why this is true, and what you can DO to shift your internal operating system to the setting of “I choose the loving, empowering, supportive, honoring choice for me!” (that is self love)
I share this with you because if I just gave you list of what you “should” do to love yourself – like go for your dreams, only have loving relationships, be compassionate with yourself, eat well, get good sleep, work and play in balance, believe in yourself, you would know these things. The list, while informative, wouldn’t be that helpful.
Where most of us struggle with self love is when it comes to our daily choices – our actions, thoughts, and how we show up or don’t show up in our lives.
We choose to work more instead of rest. We choose to stay in a relationship or job instead of follow our heart. We get critical of ourselves instead of compassionate. We say yes to others and as a result sacrifice ourselves.
We know in theory how to love ourselves, where we struggle and fail is in giving ourselves permission to take the self-loving act.
So until we rewire our “internal operating systems” to trust choosing and making the loving choice for ourselves, even if that means disappointing another, we will choose self sacrifice and sabotage or settling. The good news is, we can rewire ourselves to have the power and devotion to do what is good and right for ourselves in all parts of our lives (that is self love).
Rewiring our internal operating system is possible, and it takes time. It took us years to create the neural pathways that make us choose fear, guilt, shame, blame, pressure, stress, etc over the loving, empowering choice we know is best for us or the self supportive thought we know it ultimately true. So it would make sense that it would take time to do the reprogramming.
This is why every year, I and others around the world commit to full Year of Self Love. Where month by month, we strengthen and rewire a specific kind of self love (there are 11 types of self love including self compassion, self care, self empowerment and self trust.) I call it “The Love Club”.
It fits into your life so you can make real changes within your life. Here is what one of our members from Poland had to say…
“Your teaching was so gentle, compassionate, energetic that I literally started to feel better and better and I understood what I hadn’t had in my life before.”